Jaw Surgery Adventure - The Aftermath =8=

We entered an empty hospital bright and early in the morning and mentally prepared ourselves for the upcoming surgery. Carley did pretty well coming up to the surgery and didn't seem all to agitated even while we were in the waiting room right beforehand outside the surgery area. We were given a patient number so that I could wait in the waiting room and see what point she was at in her surgery. I didn't pay too much attention to it as I figured everything would go well and didn't have anywhere to go anyways. As it turns out, the chairs in the waiting room are wonderfully comfy... so much so that I was able to fall asleep and have a good nap while I was waiting for the procedure to be completed.

The doctor / surgeon woke me up once the operation was complete and I promptly made my way to the post-surgery observation unit. Carley was wheeled in and given a place and set up for her stay for the night. My first impression of seeing Carley was one of "Oh my goodness, what have they done to her?" She had a couple ice packs tied around her head so there was one on each side of her jaw and there were elastics keeping her jaw shut so she couldn't move her mouth.

At this point, the nurses then came in and started going through everything she would need to know including how to feed herself with her syringe, how to use the mouthwash every morning and night, and how to press the button to get some morphine into her system if she were ever in pain at all. The recovery in the observation ward wasn't too interesting other than a lot of sleeping and water drinking and whatnot. There was a point where the morphine ran out and was replaced with another container of morphine... but Carley thought it was replaced with Tylenol, so she proceeded to use quite a bit of it. This led to the nurses and doctor being unsure whether or not she should be leaving the following day as they weren't sure if she would be able to handle the pain after the large amount of morphine she took throughout the night.

We did manage to get ourselves home the following day after surgery. The following days included a lot of switching ice packs around the freezer and managing all of Carley's medication for pain and antibiotics. The only real bump in the road we hit was that the hospital seemed to get Naproxen and Dilauded mixed up and told us everything was available in Moose Jaw except Dilauded. So we got to Moose Jaw and found that they didn't have Naproxen which was a bit of an issue because Carley's face and neck at this point was slowly expanding into a balloon and she was having issues breathing because of this. We got through the first night using Children's Advil and got some Naproxen from a different drug store the next morning.

What has been the hardest part about this process so far? I would say... the pain has been manageable for her, so that wouldn't be the hardest. Probably the really most difficult thing has been the food... or lack of. As it turns out, Carley isn't terribly interested in only having liquids every day and it really is pretty hard to make liquids interesting to eat. As a result, Carley has lost quite a bit of weight in the past two weeks... around 20 lbs I believe.

Well, tomorrow is now the big day when the elastics SHOULD be removed and she can start eating soft foods once again. Wish us luck and find out soon what's on the menu and how the recovery is going. ^_^

~ Kyle Welykholowa

Depression Sucks

     If you struggle with depression as I do, then you know how crappy it can be. If you know someone who struggles with depression, then you may have some understanding of what it's like. I'm not sure how I would describe it... perhaps like there's a blanket over me and I can't get it off. Everything feels difficult.

     Some days are alright, and others I can barely get out of bed. I know I've lost weight recently from not eating enough food - though I don't know how much. Sometimes it's triggered by certain events, other times I have absolutely no idea what causes it. That's the mystery of depression.

     So it's a difficult thing to understand. People who have no experience with depression may have trouble knowing what to do, or how to handle someone with such a problem. Supporting a depressed person isn't as difficult as it sounds though. I recently read an article that explained it in a really good way. If someone told you they had an energy-sucking flu that made it really difficult to get out of bed, you would probably be like "oh man, that energy-sucking flu really sucks." And that's basically what it's like. It's not something weird and out there. It's like catching an energy-sucking flu for a while.

     As someone who has to deal with this sort of thing, I can tell you the best thing you can do for someone in this position is to just remain calm, and be there for them. You don't have to find solutions for them. Searching for a solution to depression while depressed is kinda like going to the store for a fire extinguisher while your house is on fire. Not exactly the best time. Seriously, just be there for them. One of the worst parts of being depressed is feeling like you're in the way. Feeling like you don't want to bring everyone else down with you. Sometimes all they need is someone to talk to. Someone willing to ride out the storm with them.

     The days get better. Some days are worse, some days are better. But it does pass in time... just like an energy-sucking flu.

My Awesome Girlfriend.

     As you may be able to guess by the title, I have a girlfriend. We've been through a lot together in a little over a year now, and for all the things we've been through and done together, I love her so incredibly much. She tends to have troubles thinking she's beautiful enough, or smart enough, or even good enough. I can definitely say she's all of those things and more.

     She is without a doubt the most beautiful girl I have ever had the luxury of seeing. She worried about being over- or under-weight, but I don't even care. as long as I have a place beside her in my life I couldn't care if she were 90 or 300 pounds (though I know she wouldn't let herself get like that).

     She's certainly the smartest girl I've ever met. Her brain obviously works in a different way due to a mixture of ADHD and childhood traumas. Not to mention her mother's terrible choices while pregnant with her. But even with these hurdles, she managed to graduate high school ahead of time and then get a degree right after that way faster than most other people. Yeah, I would agree that she sometimes has troubles knowing what to do in certain situations. Sometimes she doesn't know how to handle certain situations. But that doesn't mean I don't love her. We all have problems of some kind. I haven't had the difficult childhood she had, and still, I'm not sure I would argue that I have better social or relationship skills than she has. We're all smart in our own way, and I value her brains in the creative and determined ways that she is smart.

     Now, due to my past relationships, I'm a pretty picky person. If someone wasn't treating me right, or if I didn't think they were worth it, I wouldn't stay with them. So when she wonders whether or not she's good enough... She is completely absolutely without a doubt good enough. I would jump in front of a train for her. Yeah, we've had our issues, but that has only made us stronger. I know that once she gets her job(s) and we're able to move in together, everything will turn out wonderful. I know you can do whatever you put your mind to my love. And I know that everything we've been through will have been worth it in the end. You my love, are more than good enough. You're my Carley.

~ Kyle