What Happened Last Month

I find myself sitting here, wondering to myself... what happened last month? I'm really not going to go into the entire detail of what caused what and who did this and that. I think there's much more important lessons to learn from the events that transpired over the past month.

For anybody who doesn't know, my wife moved out for about one month and is now back home where she belongs. There are underlying issues which I believe this has brought forth and from this point things can go one of two ways: either we learn from this and become a stronger couple who work together, or we learn absolutely nothing at all except that perhaps we just don't work out as a couple. I like to think we have taken the first path of learning to be better together where rather than avoiding each other we take the time to talk and work through our issues.

My personal learning from this event has brought me to the conclusion that staying up all night long isn't the way to go, because it only makes me tired the next day and unable to function properly. As it turns out, sleeping at night definitely makes me more motivated and able to do things during the day. I suppose the fact that I start work most days by 7:00 am helps me be tired by the time it starts getting late at night... it also helps that I'm pretty much forced to get up at 6:30 or earlier every day (including days off) either because of the dogs going mental at stupid times of the night / morning, or because our DEAR SWEET baby girl now wakes up most days no later than 6:30 in the morning because she often goes to daycare before I start work... which also means I have to be up even earlier than usual.

I suppose I've also learned that I need to pay more attention to both Carley's an my own needs and emotions and we need to work at talking together instead of brushing things off and hoping that's the end of it; emotions are important and valid, even when they seem stupid. Though someone else's problems may not make sense and may seem insignificant to you, those problems may be much more meaningful to them.

On that note, I've learned things about myself as well; such as that I am important, and I can do things for myself as well as others. I still don't like going out of the house very much, but I am feeling much better about myself. The most troubling thing I'm currently dealing with is finding the motivation to get things done while I'm not on working time or taking care of Isabelle... instead of sleeping. I seriously hate sleep; I wish I never had to sleep ever again... but it feels soooooooooooooo goooooooooooooooooood to sleep and / or nap.

I do have a lot of plans on the go right now though: Dates with Carley, playing with and teaching Isabelle, cleaning and organizing the house so that we can actually find things and not feel like it (the basement) is cluttered, making blog posts and videos, and somehow finding all the time to do all of this and keep going without running out of energy! ........ Oh... I also want to get into a regular habit of taking the dogs for a walk, and playing games with friends (most importantly my wife), and drawing / doodling, maybe taking the time to colour, read some books, get into biking once the weather clears up... there's so much I want to do and so little time to do it all.

Every day is a learning experience, but we'll get there... together.

~ Kyle Welykholowa ^_^